A Long, Hard Month

So January this year, to me, as been a really long and difficult month. It has been full of a lot of hard decisions, a lot of sadness and a lot of tough grown up stuff that I usually try to avoid.

I think January is initially so hard because it is a new year. There are new expectations, resolutions, people think of it as the month that things change. It is a lot of pressure for the month to live up to. And most certainly, for most, it fails every time.

And for us, December means Christmas and Adriana's birthday. It is a big month. A busy month, but a very happy month. January is for sure a let down after all that.

This year I decided to do no resolutions. No expectations to fail. Sure, I did decide to stop yo yo dieting and finally get this weight off healthily instead of fad dieting, but I made that resolution in November so I guess it doesn't really count. And because of that I am actually doing ok at it. I have worked out every day this month but 2, and I have lost 8 lbs but eating normally. Not bad. Going slower than I want, but well, I think that is the best way to do it.

But for me, it has still been a challenging month. I have spent a good portion fighting some inner demons (and some outside ones too) and just at this point, am glad I made it through the month. Thanks to my amazing brother and sister in law, Rob and I get to leave town this weekend alone, no child, and spend the weekend relaxing in my sister's town home in Breckenridge. I literally cannot wait and am so ready. I just want to sleep, watch movies and maybe sleep some more.

And thankfully for some serious conversations and what I like to call "cleansing blog posts" I had last weekend, I think things are looking up.